Oh, What a Tangled Web…
Part I. The Divorce and Suicide of Nimet
In the fall of 1931, Lee Miller’s roommate and best friend, Tanja Ramm introduced Lee to her friend Aziz Eloui Bey, a wealthy Egyptian businessman. At the time, Aziz was married to Nimet Eloui Bey, (née Khairy). According to Antony Penrose’s Lives, Lee and Aziz entered into an affair during the holiday season of 1931-32 in St. Moritz. Aziz, like Man Ray was almost twenty years older than Lee, who was twenty-four at the time.
Aziz and Nimet are a very important component of the Lee Miller story and deserve a deeper examination than that which has been presented to date.
According to the first edition of Lives (1985):
“Aziz, using the Muslim husband’s prerogative, and with all the lack of ceremony inherent in a Muslim divorce, severed his ties with Nimet. Distraught, she took a room in the Hȏtel Bourgogne et Montana where, with liquor supplied by a Russian friend, she drank herself to death in the space of a few weeks.
Lee was tossed about in the centre of a storm of passion. Her own feelings for Aziz were far from clear and she had certainly not expected his hasty reaction and the death of Nimet” (Emphasis added) (1).
However, in the 2007 edition of Lives, and every edition of that follows, the events are reported:
“Aziz, using the Muslim husband’s prerogative, and with all the lack of ceremony inherent in a Muslim divorce, severed his ties with Nimet.
Lee was tossed about in the centre of a storm of passion. Her own feelings for Aziz were far from clear and she had certainly not expected his hasty reaction” (2).
How, and why, did the story change? There has never been a clarification, explanation or retraction presented for the change by Antony Penrose in text or interview. Interestingly, however, there is a statement beneath the copyright notice in the 2013 edition of Lives where it says, in very small print:
“Reprinted with corrections 2007, 2013”.
This disclaimer is some twenty-two years after the original story of divorce and suicide. Twenty-two years for the footprint to set.
“Reprinted with corrections” is meaningless without identifying what is being corrected. It is a unusual statement for a publisher to print on the copyright notice page. For a reader to ascertain if there are any changes, the reader would need to place the 1985 edition and the 2007 edition side by side for a line-by-line analysis. Even with that, it is impossible to know that a change is a “correction” rather than a stylistic change, editorial change or change simply due to reconsideration unrelated to the truthfulness of the original text in the book. Change does not equal correction. The disclaimer is devoid of meaning and, for that reason, the original 1985 edition is relied upon for the purposes of this forum. That being said, it is possible to look a little further into certain events that may have affected the “change” in the story.
In Carolyn Burke’s original publication of Lee Miller: A Life (2005), her description of the circumstances surrounding the relationship of Lee and Aziz does not reference a suicide, but in a footnote, she states:
“Judging by the tales: Although it was thought that Nimet committed suicide, she recovered sufficiently to sublet Djuna Barnes’s Paris apartment in 1933, and after her divorce, to marry Prince Nicholas Mertchersky. Nimet died on August 4, 1942 (Jaloux)” (3).
There are a few curious observations in this footnote the first being what “tales” and the second being who “thought” she committed “suicide”. Other than the 1985 Penrose claim there does not appear to be anyone, other than Penrose, who thought there was a tale of suicide to be told. Despite the Burke footnote, the error has become another embellishment that carries forward. In his 2017 article, Sands of Desire: The Creative Restlessness of Lee Miller’s Egyptian Period, Professor Peter Schulman references and continues the legend of Nimet’s suicide and attributes the following to Antony Penrose:
“according to her son Antony Penrose, Miller had felt incredible guilt regarding the suicide and ‘took a great deal of trouble to obscure that part of her life” (4).
Although the Penrose quote is prior to 2007, it is noteworthy that he speaks of “incredible guilt” by Lee and her difficulty in dealing with it, when, as we shall see, there was never a suicide.
The divorce, suicide and Lee’s reaction all appear to come out of thin air, but the reference to “Jaloux” is an important point because it refers to a book well known to followers of the famous and influential poet, Rainer Maria Rilke, Rilke: His Last Friend (5). Burke was writing her book with the full cooperation of Antony Penrose and the citation to the Jaloux book indicates that Burke was aware that Nimet did not commit suicide and that she lived for more than ten years after her “suicide”. If this information was shared with Antony Penrose, who Burke credits profusely in the acknowledgments in her book, the change from the first edition to the subsequent editions would be explained. Penrose, however, does not refer to Burke’s book, nor does he reference Jaloux’s 1949 (French edition) book.
There are several points to discuss related to the story of Nimet’s divorce, suicide and how the involved parties were tossed around in the “storm of passion.”
The “suicide” of Nimet merits discussion, because the story survives as a part of the femme fatale legend of Lee Miller. Lee, as the femme fatale causing the divorce and death of a woman married to her lover is a rather dark and ugly garnishment. In fairness to the memory of both women, the record needs to be corrected.
Jaloux describes many events of Nimet’s life in the ten years that followed her “suicide” including an audience with Pope Pius XI and her effort to enter the film industry. However, outside the four corners of Jaloux’s book, there is dispositive photographic evidence in the form of Vogue photographs taken and published of Nimet and Man Ray portraits of her taken after her “suicide”.
Jaloux discusses in his book that Nimet renounced Islam and married Prince Nikolay Petrovich Mertchersky (b. 1905, d. 1966). According to Jaloux, she was buried after succumbing to ill health in the St. Genevieve-des-Bois Russian Orthodox Cemetery in the Mertchersky family plot. Her grave is indeed, as reported by Jaloux in 1949, in the St. Genevieve-des-Bois cemetery and references her maiden name “Khairy” and the date of death of August 4, 1942.
Additionally, although the claim is that Nimet’s “suicide closely followed her divorce”, there is no evidence that she and Aziz divorced. At the time, divorce among elite Egyptian families was exceedingly rare with separation and maintenance of the seperated spouse being the preferred solution. Jaloux always referred to Nimet as “separated” in his book, and never divorced. As late as 1936 in articles appearing in Vogue, she was referred to as Madame Eloui Bey. In any event, it would have been unnecessary for Aziz to divorce Nimet in order to marry Lee since as a wealthy Muslim man, he could have legally taken multiple wives. After the separation, Nimet’s financial situation certainly diminished, but she was supported at the Hotel Bourgagne et Montana, by someone and, in the event of separation that would have been Aziz.
However, there is no need to speculate on the status of the marriage of Aziz and Nimet. Two years after leaving Paris, Aziz sailed on the SS Rex to New York for business related to the Egyptian railway system. The ship’s manifest (May 24th, 1934) reveals that he was still married to Nimet as of May, 1934 and that he had not divorced her as has been universally reported since 1985. During that 1934 business trip to New York, Aziz married Lee on July 19th, 1934. Lee Miller became the second Mrs. Eloui Bey. It was a marital status that she shared concurrently with Nimet until Nimet’s repudiation of Islam and marriage to Prince Mestchersky.
Part II. Love and Marriage
It is not absolutely certain how Lee knew Aziz was coming to New York in May 1934 but according to the 1933 director of Four Saints in Three Acts, John Houseman;
“‘After hearing from Aziz, who was on his way to New York on behalf of the Egyptian Railway, she closed her studio and went to a “fat farm” (Hay-Ven?). ‘She disappeared for a week,’ Houseman recalled, ‘and returned having lost about fifteen pounds, radiantly beautiful; she went out and bought or got someone to give her a few glorious dresses so that by the time he arrived, she was in prime condition’” (6).
When Aziz left for New York for business there were no plans or preparation for a marriage. He had not seen Lee in more than two years nor is there evidence of any communication between them prior to his departure. There was no engagement, no notice to family, no bridal shower, no wedding reception, or any indicia that Aziz anticipated he would be leaving the United States with a second wife. Even the wedding announcement in The New York Times was posted when Aziz and Lee were already in Egypt.
The afternoon of her marriage, Lee simply called her mother to say that she and Aziz had been married. It was a surprise to all.
According to Penrose in Lives:
“The first formality had been at a Manhattan registry office, where the presiding official took it upon himself to caution Lee about the inadvisability of marrying a black man, and a foreigner to boot. Lee delivered a tirade that left the wretched man completely taken aback, and the papers were swiftly produced. The couple were better received at the Royal Egyptian Consulate in New York City where they were married under Mohammedan law on 19 July 1934” (7).
Carolyn Burke in Life of Lee Miller states:
“ The Wedding had taken place in Manhattan on July 19, in a civil ceremony with an official who warned Lee about marrying a foreigner who was also “black” (she became so angry that their paperwork was expedited). Later that day, they were also wed according to Muslim law at the Egyptian consulate” (8).
Both descriptions of the events of suspect. Lee’s “tirade” seems farfetched because Aziz would not only present as an educated English gentleman, he was in fact, Caucasian.
The Assistant Commissioner of the New York City Department of Record and Information Services, found no record of a marriage certificate. The Assistant Commissioner, directly suggested that because the marriage was performed in the Egyptian Consulate, a license was not obtained and no civil marriage resulted.
This makes perfect sense from Aziz’s point of view. Why would a wealthy Muslim expose himself to a felony charge of bigamy, expose his wealth to a New York Divorce Court, limit himself to one wife and yield other advantages (for men) of an Islamic marriage to the jurisdiction of a U.S. court? The only marriage mentioned in newspapers of Aziz and Lee was as a Muslim ceremony in the Egyptian Consulate which is effectively Egyptian territory.
As a Muslim wife, Lee had no rights without the New York civil marriage and access to U.S. courts. Aziz could toss her out at any time and according to his third wife, Elda, and her family, he did (9).
Part III. 1,002 Arabian Nights
In 1947, while Lee was pregnant, Aziz came to London to divorce her. A divorce would have been necessary to avoid the criminal and civil implications of bigamy and to legitimize the child as that of Roland Penrose.
Roland Penrose draws this idyllic setting for divorce “Muslim style”:
“That spring, however, arrived and with it Aziz, who was at last able to come to London with the intention of giving Lee a divorce in Muslim style. He did this with grace and efficiency and frequently dined with us in an unconventional manner. Valentine was staying with us at the time and Lee, who was confined to her bed, gave dinner parties for –Aziz. Valentine and myself sat round a card table at the foot of her bed while we listened in enchantment to the stories in Arabian Nights’ style that Aziz could spin endlessly. A few days later, with pear trees in full bloom in the garden, Lee and I were married and in September she gave birth to our son, Antony” (10).
As enchanting as Aziz was as he charmed the soon-to-be-wed couple with his stories of the 1,001 Arabian Nights, the reality is that, as Lee’s legally married husband, he would be the presumed father. He would be legally and financially responsible for the child and the child would be entitled to all rights of legitimacy, including inheritance. Aziz would have a much greater incentive to divorce Lee than merely accommodating her so that she could marry Roland.
Aziz divorced Lee by Talaq. It is unclear if the Talaq was irrevocable (Talaq-e-Biddat) with Aziz repeating the words “Thee, I divorce” three times, or revocable Talaq (Talaq-e-Ahsan or Talaq-e-Hasan) where there is a single pronouncement of “Thee, I divorce”. In either case, the question is irrelevant because, after Talaq, there was no revocation through resumption of co-habitation. Talaq, in all cases, must be given where the woman is in the “state of purity”. If a woman is pregnant her divorce is not final until she gives birth to child (Iddat, a waiting period after divorce during which a spouse may not remarry). Lee married Roland before giving birth while she was still married to Aziz from the ceremony in the Egyptian consulate. In other words, she committed bigamy.
The civil effect of a bigamy is not simply to make the marriage voidable, it makes it void ab initio, as if it never happened. Intent, belief or even consent are completely irrelevant to this outcome. As might be expected, there is no record of divorce between Lee and Aziz in the United Kingdom. By contrast, Roland's divorce from his first wife, Valentine was readily obtainable as was Lee and Roland's notice of marriage. There is simply no record of a divorce from Aziz. The implications of a bigamy are broad. For example, Lee took her title, Elizabeth, Lady Penrose by a marriage that never existed. Ironically, Roland had an affair with Diane Deriaz for almost thirty years and he would refer to her as Diane, Lady Penrose. She had as much a right to the title as Lee, although Roland was presumably speaking from his heart, as opposed to knowledge about Talaq. The Talaq had the exact opposite effect of what Lee and Roland were attempting to achieve by having Aziz divorce Lee in London. Her spousal rights were obliviated and would include rights of legitimacy and inheritance of her child.
Interestingly, even if Lee had married Aziz in a New York civil ceremony, it would have had the same result. To dissolve a civil marriage, she would have needed to obtain a civil divorce either in English or an American court. (The U.S. and the U.K. recognize each other’s jurisdiction). A divorce would not be effective or enforced in a civil court based upon Talaq. There would need to be a filing, hearing and a judicial order. A man simply walking up to his wife and saying, “Thee, I divorce” would have absolutely no legal effect in a court of civil jurisdiction.
Upon arriving back in Egypt it appears that Aziz had one more story to add to his enchanting tales of the Arabian Nights.
Footnotes
(1) Penrose, Antony (1985) The Lives of Lee Miller Thames & Hudson (page 40)
(2) Penrose, Antony (2013) The Lives of Lee Miller Thames & Hudson (page 40)
(3) Burke, Carolyn (2005) Lee Miller: A Life Knopf, New York (footnote- page 123)
(4) Schulman, Peter (2017) Sands of Desire: The Creative Restlessness of Lee Miller’s Egyptian Period, referencing 1995 Roumette Sylvain (Director) Lee Miller: Through the Mirror, Chicago, Illinois home video.
(5) Jaloux, Edmond (1952) English translation, Philosophical Library New York of La Derniere Amitie de Rainer Maria Rilke (1949) edited by Marcel Raval cover photograph, Man Ray.
Edmond Jaloux was a novelist and literary critic. Marcel Raval was poet, novelist and acquaintance of both Nimet and Man Ray. He was a supporter of Man Ray and devoted an issue of his avante garde magazine, Les Fueilles Libres to Man Ray’s drawings and rayographs. See Man Ray, Self Portrait (1963) Little Brown & Company, Boston (page 281)
(6) Burke, Carolyn (2005) Lee Miller: A Life Knopf, New York, in an interview with John Houseman by NPR “Morning Edition” March 2nd, 1989 (page 140)
(7) Penrose, Antony (1985) The Lives of Lee Miller Thames & Hudson (page 56)
(8) Burke, Carolyn (2005) Lee Miller: A Life Knopf, New York (page 140)
(9) Email correspondence with Sylvia Mikkelsen (2021) that discusses when Aziz gave Lee a week to pack her bags after he caught her with another man “en flagrant délit”.
(10) Penrose, Roland (1981) Scrapbook Rizzoli International Publications Inc (page 146)